A Surprise

Beauty

Over the past year I've strayed into becoming a night owl. Night classes don't help, either. Nor does being a bum. As such, I went to bed around 4:30 last night and woke up at noon. As such, noon was my morning, and as I drank my coffee I noticed a large brown box on the deck. My brother's always ordering essential car parts (like the Dixie horn and testicles for his truck) so I assumed it was his. A little bit later my mom announced that it was for me. I was surprised to find that it was from MGM.

My sister was home early so we opened it together, assuming it was a DVD set of the TV show Reno 911, which we've never seen, but entered a parody contest for a few months ago. Since we were the only entry MGM "killed" the contest and the guy running it was nice enough to say he'd try to get us some DVDs for our trouble. Though the box felt a little heavy for DVDs.

On the top was crumpled papers from the LA Times followed by the most exciting sight of tons of... wait for it... free FedEx envelopes! Imagine the joy. I squealed. When we cleared all of those out we stared in shock. At the bottom of the box was a white Apple bag. Inside it was a white Apple box. Inside that was a white Apple Macbook. We stared in shock. Who the hell would send us a free computer?

My only deduction is that it's a prize for winning the Reno Vs. Chapelle contest... or rather for entering, since as I said the contest died. I hope it wasn't sent to me by mistake. There was no "congratulations" letter or anything. It was like Santa came early! Though if a free laptop is the reward for stuffing my bra and and murdering a bear after getting farted on on-screen, then I'm saving my socks for just that from now on. Though it could just be that we were the only entrants. Here's the video I assume merited this:



I'm not a "Mac person" and hate feeling like I'm owned by the Man (meaning the pear-shaped Steve Wozniak who frequents the area) but am intrigued by this new machine. That is, when it's on. When it's off it's terrifying. It just sits there on my bed like a fat white man, blinking expectantly. My sister and I deduced that it frightens us because it cast a spell in the delivery truck. This is insight into my 4.0 GPA.

Here are some pictures from the event:

Alex making good use of the envelopes.

The fat man himself.

And here's footage of the momentous event - my sister doing the honors of opening it for the first time:



My reaction to it all: